Iowa Hawkeye Fans - This is Why Iowa is the #1 Party School

Iowa was recently named the #1 party school in the U.S.  I live in Iowa and have spent a few nights over in Iowa City partying my butt off.  Not a bad place to party, but nothing beats University of Texas and 6th Street...But I digress.  

This chick is lucky to be alive!  An Iowa Hawkeye football fan named Samantha Goudie who happens to go by @vodka_samm on Twitter (how appropriate!) was arrested last Saturday at the University of Iowa Football game.  Samantha tried to jump the fence and run onto the field while the game was going on.  The Univ. of Iowa police arrested her and gave her the breath test.  She blew a .341!!!  DAMN!!!  Most people would be dead at that level.  That is over 4 times the legal limit!!!  

Here's the University of Iowa's police report:

Goudie, Samantha Lynne, 22 of Iowa City, IA for Public Intox at Kinnick Stadium at 1321 hours. Goudie was stopped for trying to enter the field. Goudie was unsteady on her feet. Goudie blew .341 PBT.

She then proceeded to Tweet about the incident. Via Deadspin

Just went to jail #yolo

— Samantha Goudie (@Vodka_samm) August 31, 2013

My mom had to get me out of jail and had to take a breathalizer #lmao

— Samantha Goudie (@Vodka_samm) August 31, 2013

Blew a .341 in jail

— Samantha Goudie (@Vodka_samm) August 31, 2013

My mom hates me too

— Samantha Goudie (@Vodka_samm) August 31, 2013

I'm going to get .341 tattooed on me because its so epic

— Samantha Goudie (@Vodka_samm) August 31, 2013

Girl waiting for court with me goes "I wish I knew the girl who blew a .341" I said hi

— Samantha Goudie (@Vodka_samm) September 1, 2013

Ive gotten so many hate tweets because I was drunk...uh I get good grades sorry for being like every other college student

— Samantha Goudie (@Vodka_samm) September 1, 2013

Go Hawks motherfuckers

— Samantha Goudie (@Vodka_samm) September 1, 2013

@ThoseIowaBoys I was not trying to enter the game

— Samantha Goudie (@Vodka_samm) September 1, 2013

#reunited pic.twitter.com/B803u7dNzJ

— Samantha Goudie (@Vodka_samm) July 26, 2013

alcoholism https://t.co/Dk2vPMHd7l

— Samantha Goudie (@Vodka_samm) August 21, 2013

I am sure she made her parents proud.  She sure is going to be a great wife someday.  She should try and hook up with Charlie Sheen.  They were made for each other.  And think of her kids.  This shit will be online 20, 30 years from now.  Her kids will google or bing her and this shit is gonna come up!  

College - I Was an Idiot Sometimes

Its early morning and just like any other school day you take a shower, brush your teeth, eat breakfast and watch the morning sports headlines on ESPN’s Sportscenter while you are getting dressed. Another fun filled day of Boring classes awaits you as you leave your house in complete misery (and many times that misery is accompanied by a hangover.) By this time the thought of not going and just staying home has crossed your mind at least five times, but you decide to push on and somehow manage to get to a class that you have absolutely no desire in learning anything about (Damn Pre-requisites and required courses.) While driving your shitty car on the way to the campus, you think to yourself of how much it’s going to suck to drive around and try to find a parking space.  Then you have to walk 10 more minutes across the campus to the class. You pray you can make it and not walk in late, like you have already done 8 times this semester.  

You finally arrive in the parking lot and start circling the lot like a vulture circling a dog that is about to die.  WHOA!  In the distance, you see someone getting into their car way up in the front row of the parking log.  You gun your car and race over there, trying to beat anyone else who might have spotted this rare occurrence.  HOORAY!  You made it!  You are in the front row for only the second time in your three years at the university.  You think to yourself “Maybe this day is going to be pretty good!” 

You start your 10-minute trek to class and you bump into the incredibly hot girl you liked in your Chemistry class last semester.  She recognizes you and says Hi.  You talk for a minute then tell her you hope to see her again soon as you have to get to class.  You exchange numbers.  Now you have an extra spring in your step and you get to class just as the professor is heading in to start the lecture.  You have a BIG SMILE on your face! This might be the best day of the semester…Hell it might be the best day of your entire College Career.

You settle in the seat and get your things out.  As you look around the room you notice that everyone is hurried writing and flipping through books, stapling papers, etc.  You ask the guy next to you what is going on with all the activity.  He tells you everyone is putting their final touches on the term paper assigned last month that is due today and worth 40% of your final grade! 

OH SHIT!!  The day takes an immediate nose dive as you remember that a month ago, you missed a few classes in a row because you went to New Orleans for Mardi Gras… 

Yes, this actually happened to me!  I think that must have been the worst feeling I ever had in college.  I had totally forgotten about it because I skipped a few classes.  I had also lost the syllabus and this was before everything was posted online.  OOOPS!  I talked to the professor and made up a story about family matters and having to go home to visit the family for a few days.  He let me turn in the paper late, but for half credit.  I ended up getting an 48 on it when it should have been a 96%.  I ended the class with a C+, because of that paper.  I got an A on the two other tests and an A+ on the final.  I was such a Damn Idiot!!!  

What Does it Say About American Society...

...when Walmart actually has this sign at their entrance?  Isn't this something that should be second nature for people?  WOW!!!  I have had two kids and I never ever forgot them.  Even if they were sound asleep, I knew they were there.  I was so paranoid, I would regularly double check the back seat even if I knew they weren't there, just to be sure.  Come on People!!!

You Know It Is Time to Defriend When...

There is no doubt that Facebook is fun and probably here to stay (at least for the foreseeable future).  I have found many old friends and made new ones via Facebook.  But, There can be a dark evil side to Facebook.  Yes, evil things are happening on Facebook everyday.  There are way too many people who spam our news feeds every day with crap about Farmville or Frontiersville, etc.  Then there are those who are prolific picture posters.  They post photos of their vacations, parties, etc. that we really don’t want to see (Yes, I am guilty of the family vacation pics, I probably have over 100 from Colorado -- But I am talking about the people who post about 20 or 30 pics every single day!!!)  No one wants to be defriended and most of us really don't want to do it.  Defriending someone on Facebook is a measure of last resort, but here are some reasons you might have to go there.

7.  They’re spamming your phone

Like many Facebook users, I like to check my account via phone when I’m bored. And while it’s easy to block peoples’ statuses from your news feed, the iPhone and Blackberry Facebook applications won’t let you. The mobile app also has a tendency to show the same dumb Mafia and Farmville spam over and over again, taking up the entire application and rendering your news feed useless. So if someone’s playing those games and your phone is the victim, feel free to defriend them.

6.  They keep commenting on your posts

We all make Facebook statuses to get comments and reactions. But it’s hard to get other peoples’ thoughts when you have one Facebook friend who’s always the first person to comment on your statuses no matter what. You try to post updates at different times of day, but he always gets there first — it’s like he never logs out.  And he always posts something that kind of turns everyone else off from posting.  If you just can’t get him to stop, you gotta defriend.

5.  They keep commenting on OTHER peoples’ posts

Let’s say this girl just posted on your wall to say hey. Let’s say you’re psyched about that. Let’s say one of your douchebag Facebook friends comments on her wall post saying “hey dude, is this the girl you were telling me about?” Defriend, defriend, defriend.

4.  They’re strangers

“Oh, cool, Alex just got a new car and he’s really happy that it’s Friday… hold on a second, who the Hell is Alex?” When you find yourself wondering how you know somebody or if you really know them at all, it’s time to defriend.  (I have over 900 friends and I think I personally have met most of them.  They were either my students, High School friends, friends from my travels, family members, etc.)  There are a few of you, my loyal blog followers who have requested that I add you and If I know you are a Ramblings Blog Reader, I will add you.  Other than that, I try to stay away from strangers (even the hot looking ones because they are usually guys anyway.)  

3.  They keep sending you event invites

It’s one thing if you have a cool party or show or performance that you want people to come check out. If you want to organize a special event, then by all means, invite people on Facebook. But when you have a radio show that goes on every single week at the same exact time and you keep sending me weekly invitations, you are going to get defriended. Or if you want to remind your group that there is practice every Sunday night, then just send the invite to your group members, not to everyone.  DEFRIEND!!  Sorry, that is just the way it is.  

2.  Their statuses show a whole new side to them

Well, I thought I liked you until your Facebook status said you were going to go see “Dave” next weekend. Or you shared way too much information about your boy problems and now I can’t ever look at you the same way without thinking about that one thing he did with the ice cream and his finger.   Or your status is "Let's send all the Mexicans back home!"  If you are a creeper, a racist, have some weird or strange tastes or just a plain idiot -- Sorry, but we’re not friends anymore. 

1.  They are always posting incoherent things

Have you heard of spell check?  Or maybe you shouldn't post stuff when you are drunk.  Sometimes, I see things on my Facebook that make absolutely no sense at all.  When it becomes habitual and just about every post is like that, then DEFRIEND -- Lest your normal friends think you have idiot friends. =

Terrifying Tuesday - This Jersey Shore Orange Thing Has Got to Stop!

Enough with the Extreme Tans guys!!!  And Girls, what the Hell do you see in those idiots anyway? 

Terrible Tattoos - Dallas Skyline

First off - Why would you get a tattoo of the Dallas Skyline?  Of all the things to represent Dallas?
Secondly - WHY ON THE BACK OF YOUR HEAD!!!

More Bad Tattoos Here